You cannot teach salvation to a halibut
You cannot preach the gospel to a trout
A pollock or a bass
Will never attend Mass
And hake don't know what Islam is about
Anchovies do not have a religion
Pike and perch do not believe in God
Turbot have no saviour
To redeem their bad behaviour
And hellbound are the whiting and the cod
The tuna has no concept of a heaven
The mackerel has no concept of a soul
The unrepentant carp
Will play no angelic harp
And you'll find no faith within a herring shoal
Fish are not devoted to religion
Fish are not inclined to praise the lord
It's not the piscine way
To evangelise or pray
And that's an attitude that I applaud.
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